It was 7:07 a.m. when my phone rang. I looked a the caller ID and my heart stopped. I knew what this call was going to be and it wasn’t going to be fun.
“Did it happen?”
“Yup. Late yesterday afternoon.”
“Ugh…I’m so sorry.”
Last Tuesday morning I had sent a text to my friend, John Martin, telling him I was thinking about him and sending him gobs of love. I didn’t expect a response, but it came, late on Thursday and it all said was “Takn.”
I knew in my heart that it was the last text I’d ever receive from him and it saddened me greatly.
John was diagnosed with ALS two years ago and the last few weeks his decline was swift. His wife had told me it would be only be days until he’d lose his ability to text….the last bit of movement he was understandably holding onto for dear life.
We all go through unfavorable cycles of witnessing the events in other people’s lives. For some reason, I’ve had a lot of sick and dying people in my space for an extended stretch. As an empath it has kicked my ass, not gonna lie.
As a result of where I’m at, here’s what’s on the front of my brain this morning.
If I told you how many times this quote has showed up in my life as a meme these last two weeks, you wouldn’t believe me. Is the universe speaking to me?
Let’s dissect this quote just a bit.
As I compare my friends disease (ALS) with my own (Hashimoto’s) they are completely different. ALS is the worst death sentence ever with no cure or hope for improvement. Mine, while not fun when in the thick of it, can actually be treated successfully and I can (and have) reversed my outcome.
Here’s the $1million question?
When we are ill and know it, why do we hold onto negative behaviors that we know aren’t serving us?
Why can’t we seem to care enough about ourselves and our outcome to make the changes we need to make to swing things in a better direction?
There’s no fixing ALS, and I’m not trying to pretend that we can, but when it comes to autoimmune disease there is a lot we can fix through diet and lifestyle change. Even with the power that comes with change and still I hear…
…but my pasta…
…but my coffee…
…but my cheese…
…but my chocolate…
Trust me, I am the pot calling the kettle black! I was guilty of all of this early on, especially my denial that gluten was a problem for me. I hung onto that shit for 4 months after I had been told to give it up.
Let go or be dragged.
We have the power to change outcomes, yet we cling to the familiar, even when we know it no longer serves us.
Nobody said it was going to be easy. Simple? Absolutely, but simple and easy are two entirely different concepts.
This most recent experience with my friend’s death has me more committed than ever before to supporting my body and my mind in the best ways possible. While I have been much better at sticking to my AIP food lifestyle, I’ve been lax in other areas of my life where I know I need to up my game.
Pain (emotional or physical) is your indicator that something is wrong. It’s a gift.
When will you be ready to do something to change your own outcome?
What’s your personal pain threshold?
What are you waiting for?
Is it time for you to let go of what no longer serves you, or will you continue to be dragged along by poor decisions?
If you could improve your health and feel better, why wouldn’t you?
Food for thought…